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It is like they wanted me to eat the phone when I called them.
After fifteen minutes. I was seriously considering it. -
Q&A
Why are you so angry?
I’m not actually angry. These posts are actually derived from my unfiltered thoughts about daily events.Is this really about you?
Actually yes. All of the events posted on this blog are of me. But I am playing a character that displays my inner unfiltered reactions to the events at hand. I do not act nor speak like this in real life.Why create a character?
I originally made this blog as a way to vent about the frustrations of my daily life.Why do you not post as often now?
I have not been having as stressful of a day of I used to. So there is nothing really to vent about.Are you going to continue this blog?
Yes. I plan to keep this blog as long as I am able.Do you have other blogs?
Yes. I have one other blog. Occasionally I vent on there, but my rants or a little more composed and rational than on this blog.What is your other blog?
I would prefer to keep this blog and my other separate to keep the Illusion of Dr. Wondopolis alive.Why Dr. Wondopolis?
It started as a game I played once with some friends. Where I would answer simple questions with rather bizarre answers. The idea took off and slowly became this blog.If you wish to know anything more about me or Dr. Wondopolis, Please leave a comment in my ASK box.
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(via maxybonn)
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And yet she stills lords over us.
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Charger
Mistress: a car is the worst place to be during a twister.
Master: Not in a Dodge charger!!! -
The future is now... sort of.
Dastardly Dave: Selling robots to poor people?
Dastardly Dave: Is it the future up in the northern states?
Mad Mortigan: yes
Dastardly Dave: that is awesome.
Dastardly Dave: Are you able to send robots down to the south? Or do they turn into laptops?
Mad Mortigan: they turn into worse
Mad Mortigan: aptiva laptops
Mad Mortigan: from the distant past
Dastardly Dave: oh my god!
Dastardly Dave: those things are like the size of a desktop today.
Mad Mortigan: yep
Dastardly Dave: and have the computering power of a gerbil.
Mad Mortigan: exactly
Dastardly Dave: quite literally. They had a little gerbil in there on a wheel powering the whole thing.
Dastardly Dave: most people didn't know this and thus didn't feed the poor thing. Hence why they were such crap laptops.
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Why am I not seeing piles of cloths everywhere? I was expecting to get new wardrobes todays.
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Reblog? Reblog?! Why would I submit myself to the same vomit you just spew out. It is not like it will taste any better once I get a hold of it.
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Next time someone tells me their fear. I’ll hand them this. It only seems fair.
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Ugly Babies
Dr. Wondopolis: I think people should make wiser decisions about who they procreate with.
Dr. Wondopolis: I'm tired of seeing ugly people.
Professor Dynamo: Remember, ugly people cant help being ugly.
Dr. Wondopolis: That is why I blame the parents.
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Gasoline and Beer
You huddle masses, gathered in a pit of gasoline and beer. You make me sick with rage. Arrogant little monsters going to stores by the hundreds, over working the slave vendors with your massive carts of red meat, beer and over priced t-shirts with a printed logo of your favorite driver.
I know the city relies on you to survive 14% of the year. But you need to realize. you are waste and nothing more to us. Shut your mouths and get on with your vacation of a car wreck waiting to happen.
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I think your sleep gland is broken
– co-worker explaining to me about insomnia -
Through your eyes, I see what a messed up world this is… it’s a good thing you’re blind.
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Waiting
Tochikoma: So, is this line long?
Carlos: Yes. I've been standing here since last year.
Tochikoma: Really now...
Carlos: No.
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Great Meatballs of Fire.
As with any typical horrible expenditure of my energy. Work was tedious and nauseating. One mindless consumer after another purchasing mounds of tasteless junk they insist is edible food.
Today would be quite the same except for one minor thing that occurred.THE MEAT CAUGHT ON FIRE!
It doesn’t even really start there. I’m busy, tending to these food zombies. When I look up, and see the blob monsters I call managerial figures are running around.
I think nothing of it, another scuffle with the mindless waste that wander the structure.
Apparently, one of the bunkers that holds the delicious yet horrible meat caused flames to ensue through out itself. And since the intercommunication system is always turned off or set to a low volume. I, among others, were unable to hear the banshee screams for evacuation.
Upon being told by one of slave vendors I work with that the building was being devoured by the cleansing fires. I immediately went into my training.
Yell at people to leave and then run for my own safety. (the latter is not included in the survival manual)Outside, we waited as the correctly trained service men dealt with the ongoing roasting of this hell I call work. And outside waited the festering slime zombies, demanding to return to the building to resume their purchasing of their slop.
One such vermin, slammed its hoof into the ground whilst waving a walking stick around, claiming we set our workplace ablaze just so it couldn’t attain it’s frosted chocolate cake snacks and brainwashing reading materials.
Fortunately for me, I was still on company time, so I sat at a beach a safe distance away from the building, watching everyone huddled near the entrance. Desperately wanting a blast of flames to rush through the doors and singe them all to a golden crisp. A lesson to teach these animals to follow proper procedure while something burns to ash. (except nothing but the low grade meat did.)
So, after the Fire Officers relinquished the building back to us, I immediately rushed off to acquire my lunch break and meddled quietly in the back while the disaster was cleaned up in the front.
Overall, a lovely yet EXTREMELY HORRIBLE AND DISGUSTING day.
